this is it: a rant.

i went to look at a house today. longmont, three bedrooms, carpet in the kitchen. it's kind of a dump, but i could care less - sooner or later, one of my cats will vomit on that kitchen carpet and leave a stain.

the leasing agent was ten minutes late. she stood in the kitchen on her cell phone the entire time we looked at the property, and casually swore, as if we weren't standing there wanting to rent a house from a reputable company, as if we didn't warrant a good impression. she had mascara smeared under her right eye. i asked her - will the landlord lease to someone with a pit bull? she said she thought not, but would confirm and get back to me. then she asked - does he have a history of attacking people?

are you an idiot? is your head shoved up your ass? do you live under a rock? why is the first fucking question out of your mouth - does your pit bull have a history of attacking people? i've had enough of this ass-backwards bullshit. not all pit bulls are aggressive, horrible, baby-killing monsters. their jaws do not lock when they bite. yes, they have been bred to be dog-aggressive, but they have also been bred to nanny your fucking children while your lazy ass drinks hot toddys in the tea room at sunset. somewhere, in the back of my mind, when you say these dumbass things to me, i think - do you also ask the mexican couple who wants to rent your property if they'll be bringing their entire, non-english speaking extended family with them? do you always make assumptions based on stereotypes? are you an ignorant, prejudiced, racist fuck? maybe i'm an asshole, but that's the way it goes.

my dog loves other dogs and is completely appropriate. he loves people, and, yes, he loves babies and children too. he lives with three cats and has never even once tried to chase them or harm them in any way. he is obedient and loving, and incredibly fucking cute. if he had some sort of behavioral issue, i would tell you because i am a responsible dog owner and don't want any thing bad to happen any more than you do. that being said, i'd like you all to know just one thing: my dog is a pit bull, and he is better than your dog. if you could meet him, you would agree with me.